Mexico City Excited to Show Off Planet’s Worst Traffic At World Cup

“If you thought rush hour in India was bad, wait until you see Periférico during rainy season,” Mayor says

MEXICO CITY — Mexico’s capital is excited to give international travelers a taste of its soul-crushing traffic and unrivaled logistical inefficiencies that will push visitors to the brink of their sanity this summer during the World Cup, Mayor Clara Brugada said in a press conference on Tuesday.

“If you’ve never sat in standstill traffic for three hours to travel two kilometers while cars incessantly honk as they plod through giant potholes in pouring rain, you’re going to love Mexico City,” Brugada said.

Commute times for World Cup games expected to range from 2 to 36 hours: Mayor

Brugada added that the timing for the World Cup, which coincides with Mexico City’s rainy season, provides a perfect opportunity to show international travelers the true chaos of an oversaturated megapolis that will send their blood pressure to all-time highs as they scream at strangers that cut them off in Chinese automobiles.

“People always talk about Mexico City’s world famous food and museums,” Brugada said. “But only when they miss the first half of a World Cup game they paid $2,000 to attend will fans really get the full experience of this world class city.”